Here at Britannia paintball centres, we make sure everyone has a super day. This got me thinking; what would the best super power be for a game of paintballing?
10: Invisibility
This sounds like the obvious super power to have. You will not be seen, so you can get the hit on everyone else, right? Wrong. You might be invisible but your safety gear, clothes and weapons would not be. Safety is our number one priority, so we would never let you play in the nude. Sorry!
9: Super Strength
You may look the part; standing there with your well-toned super body. But if you pressed too hard on your gun you would snap it in two. Also all of those muscles would slow you down and make you a much bigger target. Most likely your safety gear would not fit either…
8: Camouflage
Being able to blend into the background is awesome, that is, until someone uses the tree you’re pretending to be as target practice. Also the power would only work in the nude. And like we said before you can’t play nude at Britannia paintball… what is your obsession with being naked? Geez.
7: Flying
Being able to fly out the way of incoming paintballs will really give you the edge. Unfortunately if you fly too far you will leave the game zone and be disqualified. On the plus side you would get a great view of our movie quality props throughout the game zones.
6: Telepathy
Being able to know what your enemy is thinking would give you a massive advantage; unless of course they were thinking about the branded pizza that we supply at a cut price for lunch. Then you’d just get hungry.
5: Telekinesis
Being able to stop those paintballs in mid-air would be fantastic. Sadly, the speed that they travel at would make it almost impossible to stop them all. At best you could levitate pizzas away from other players at lunch time. Did we mention we sell pizza for lunch? :)
4: Super Speed
Would be great for being able to get places fast. Unfortunately you would be going so fast you would not know when to stop. You might stop in the path of a volley of paint balls. Or worst, end up out of bounds. So not only would you be disqualified you would also have no one to shoot at!
3: Mind Control
“Please don’t fire those paintballs at me” “I am not the player you’re looking for” “Give me your smoke grenades” “Stand on one leg and meow like a cat”. All useful things to make your enemy do in a battle scenario. The only problem is that you can’t control all of the players at once – making you an easy target, therefore inevitably OUT!
2: Slow down time
Being able to dodge out the way of paintballs like Neo from the matrix. Reach structures before everyone else. Reload in record time. All of these things would be a major advantage. In fact, this superpower almost won, but the next one is by far the best super power. Drum roll please….
1: Teleportation.
Being able instantly to get where you want, when you want. You can easily teleport away from incoming fire and appear behind your enemies in the blink of an eye. You will also be at the front of the queue to the shop and tea and coffee line. Easily the best power and therefore the winner!
You don’t need a superpower to play paintball at Britannia Paintball. Simply give us a call 24/7 on 0844 477 5098 and book yourself in for a game today